Five O'Clock in the Morning

I haven't posted for a while, mainly because I've been too busy to even think about writing.  Well, busy...and just unable to translate thoughts to text.  Simply put, caring for Mom these past couple of weeks has been one of the hardest things I have done in my life. She is moving toward the end of her journey more rapidly than we'd imagined possible, and it keeps me physically, mentally, and emotionally drained. Sigh. Really big sigh.

Still, I committed to keeping kith and kin informed here on my blog, so I'll jot a few sentences.  No pretty pictures this time.  Just words.

As I posted last, Hospice of the Piedmont is providing at-home assistance for Mom.  That means that we have advisers available 24/7; it does not mean "they" are here, on-site round-the-clock.  Hospice is wonderful, don't misunderstand; it does have limitations, though.

While Mom's pain is being managed by the meds (and for that, we are eternally grateful)...some of which must be given every 2 hours, she is no longer able to participate in her own care.  She fell twice on Monday within 12 hours, hurting her right knee pretty badly.  Is now confined to bed with a catheter; disoriented just doesn't seem to describe it adequately.  She "sleeps" the majority of the time, although she has a great deal of restlessness and agitation...and she's often in another place, mentally.  We are told that is perfectly normal behavior, but it rarely "feels" normal.  Someone must be available for her at all times, and the Home Team is a bit shy on bench strength, shall we say?  It's just me and Mr. T...and he's about to be sidelined on the DL for a couple of weeks.

Oh, we are not entirely alone in this.  Missy M is making sure we are eating well by sending us meals from near and far; we had Honey Baked Ham's turkey dinner last night, and Corky's BBQ arrived for tonight.  Hooray!  Also, Brother T has arrived from KY to help out for a few days, and Brother and SIL J&J are scheduled to come spell us on Friday.  Mom will be in Hospice Respite Care over the weekend, so that I can turn my attention to caring for my dear husband of 35 years.

You see, Mr. T is scheduled for surgery on Friday and will need 2-3 weeks to recover.  No heavy lifting.  Just think "hernia," and you will be close.  Anyway, if you are wondering whether I'll still be standing...and sane...after all of this, well, you aren't the only one. 

Here's what I'm telling everyone:  when this is all over, I am going to have a nervous breakdown.  I've worked for it...I've earned it...and NO ONE is going to deprive me of it.  I remember reading that somewhere and thought it appropriate.

Anyway.

Think positive thoughts...and, if you have any to spare, send some our way.  Muito obrigado! Muita obrigada!...which is about the extent of the Portuguese I remember...and, I'm not sure about the feminine version...:)

OK.  I hear Mom calling.  I'd better close this for now.  One foot in front of the other....

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