Friday, September 16, 2011

Changes in the Wind

Did I read that right?  The thermometer that registers the temperature from the Way Back Garden said 56 degrees this morning when I came into the Morning Room for my coffee.  Yippee!  I love cooler weather!! It also said that it was 72 degrees inside...way too warm to light up the fire. Drat.

Still, outside the wind was blowing in from the northeast for a change, rustling the leaves that have fallen...not necessarily because of the approach of Fall; more probably because they just were too hot and tired, trying to hang on the trees here at the end of Summer. The Tulip Poplar trees are the biggest contributors to the mess on the deck at the moment.

So what to do, on this day of no appointments?  I decided to finish up my Fall garden planting. Yeah, I know...most people did that several weeks ago.  Since my life has been in flux since June, though, I guess I can be forgiven for not following the seed planting calendar exactly in 2011. 

Mr. T had already cleared, weeded, and tilled several rows for me, so I got busy planting the seeds and onion sets I'd gotten yesterday from Soviero's Tri-County Garden Center (my fav).  I now have peas, beets, 4 kinds of leaf lettuces, collards, 7-Top turnip greens (grown only for the greens...:), and onions.  It can begin raining any time now.

This weather is a bit odd for September, to be sure.  But I'm not whinging about it...no, not me.  I'm too excited about getting to break in Mr. T's birthday present, a new outdoor fireplace!  Noooo, I'll take unseasonably cool weather over, say...a hurricane any day.  Especially since we got our vacation at the beach in between the hurricanes (Irene and Maria) and the dip in temps.


Charleston and Food...
a Great Combination!
We had a wonderful, relaxing, regenerating week in South Carolina.  Missy M, who has been working night and day on a work-related project, joined us as we headed to Charleston, one of our all-time favorite cities, last Sunday.  We got checked into our room, then made our way to the Charleston Crab House for dinner.  We did a little shopping in the Market area, then went to the Battery to complete our mini-tour.  Unfortunately, Knit! was closed, so no knit-shop shopping today.

The next morning, we turned north on US 17 toward Myrtle Beach, our destination for the week.  Along the route, we stopped in Georgetown, SC for lunch at another fav, The River Room. 


Missy M checks out the menu at
The River Room in Georgetown, SC
This restaurant has great food...and a fantastic view of the river dock and harbor (see photo, right).  We were fortunate to get a window table, so we got to watch the boats...and the clouds...on this beautiful special day.  You see, it was both Mr. T's birthday and Labor Day...a holiday in every sense of the word!

Back on US 17, we stopped to shop in Pawleys Island Shoppes, the home of the original Pawleys Island hammocks.  We got our "shabby chic" T-shirts/sweat shirts...and tried to go to Island Knits, only to find it, too, was closed.  What's going on here?  Was Mr. T calling ahead??  Ah well...

Enough already.  Let's see some sand and ocean, for goodness' sakes!

We made it to Myrtle!

Just a few more miles north, we came to our destination, The Hampton Inn and Suites, on the South Ocean Boulevard in Myrtle Beach.  Never been here before, since we usually stay away from the craziness that can be MBSC, choosing saner Litchfield to the south.  But, we thought it would be OK since things change around Labor Day...the official end of Summer around here.  And, we were right!

This is a fabulous place!  We had a large room on the 11th floor, with two comfy queen beds, a fridge and microwave, and a balcony looking out on the ocean...complete with two rocking chairs!  There are 4 pools, 2 lazy rivers, and a whirlpool on the property, and the beach access is easy-peasy:  walk out of the door on the lower level...you're there!  Comfortable areas, indoors and out, with rocking chairs and hammocks to read those beach-books (or, in the case of Mr. T and Missy M...those Kindles and iPads...:).  They had a two breakfast areas to service all the rooms in the two towers; full breakfast is provided in the room rate.  And the very best part?  Didn't cost a dime...nope, nada...all on Mr. T's Hilton Honors points.  I love a bargain, don't you?


Sunrise over the Atlantic...
last morning in Myrtle
 It was exactly what we all needed. That photo (right) of the sunrise over the Atlantic, taken on our last morning, says it all.

And, I am happy to report that we did finally find a knit shop that was open:  Knitting Up A Storm in North Myrtle Beach.  Stopped by on our way out of town.  Two of us loved it...one of us chose to wait in the hot car.  Bet you can guess who is who.  I got this yummilicious yarn called Cocoon by Rowan in colorway Seascape...which I thought would help me recall a warm, beach day when there's snow on the ground; it's an 80/20 merino wool and kid mohair combo.  They had a free pattern for it that I am using to knit a braided cowl.  So far, so good!

Gardening. Travel. Knitting. Good times with family. Sounds like things are back to normal.  Well, maybe not "back," but certainly on their way.

It helped to have reclaimed the front bedroom as a guest bedroom, setting up the bed where the hospital bed used to be; sorted and donated most of Momma's hanging clothes; and cleaned and cleared the front bathroom...all of which I was able to do before we left on vacation.  And, when we got back to HPNC from SC, Missy M tackled the chore of sorting the dreaded jewelry drawer.  She found several of Nana's things she wanted to keep, so that did my heart good.  Now, the only big chore left on the list is "finish cleaning out the dresser drawers"...and I know I can handle that one soon.

It's been six weeks today, and I still think about Momma several times each day.  About how much she would have loved going to the beach.  About how she would have wanted to turn the fireplace on this morning, even if it was too warm in the house.  About how she would have been excited that it was football time again...and that the Braves are probably going to see some post-Season action.

The difference now is that I am noticing many, many more smiles and fond memories...far, far fewer tears and sad thoughts.  The bereavement counselor is right:  it IS a process, and everyone's experience in dealing with the changes is different.

Indeed.

Friday, September 2, 2011

Two Steps Forward, One Step Back...Regroup and Repeat

It's been a fairly good week, overall. Mostly positive, for sure.  Some unexpected, overwhelming emotions that have caused me to hit the 'pause' button, too.  Ah well...such is life, dealing with grief, right?

Let's start with a positive, even though it's out of order on the calendar.  On Tuesday, after I had attended a Master Gardener wrap-up/planning ahead Plant Sale meeting at the Extension Center (way the heck on the other side of the county, mind you...:-), I dashed to the Moose Cafe out at the Piedmont Triad Farmer's Market to meet a couple of EMGVs at noon for a country lunch (I had the fried chicken, mashed potatoes & gravy, and green beans...yummmmm!  I just wish they would serve yeast-rolls instead of the rather bland biscuits...but you can't have everything, now can you?).  One of them is expecting her second child ANY MINUTE NOW, and I had knitted up a little outfit to welcome Baby M to the world.

5 Hour Baby Sweater Set
for Baby M

I used the 5 Hour Baby Sweater (or 5HBS, in knit-speak) patterns and some warm, washable Cascade 220 wool in hot pink and grass green to create a sweater, bonnet, and booties (see photo, left).  I enjoy knitting these patterns because they are fast and coordinated, and not just garter stitch...but I'm not sure what planet someone knitted these in only five hours!  I'm a pretty fast knitter...and I'm guessing it took at least three times as long to complete the outfit as written (only change I made was to use two colors instead of one...everything else was as written...honest...:).  OK, so I did knit the pieces while watching TV...so what else is new?  Still, I think it turned out as I'd hoped for, and the MG Mom seemed pleased to receive the gift.  Since she's moving to Michigan soon, I'm thinking the wool will be welcomed.

Other good things have included a working-lunch meeting about Speakers Bureau with MGer JA on Monday here in High Point, and a meeting with the MG Rose Garden Project Team in the lovely Learning Center in the Legacy Garden on Wednesday.  Yes, I did go back out to Burlington Road again the very next day.  My car knows the way...what else can I say?

We are working our way through all the tasks necessary to make our presentation on the rose garden on October 5th.  The biggest task for this project has been to identify the roses that we already have planted there.  Hard to imagine, but there is no written record that we can locate.  Well, we're gonna take care of that!  And, we will be ordering and planting a few more later this month...now that's exciting!  Because it has been decided to table the Earthkind (c) Trial Rose Garden I mentioned in my last post for a while, I'm happy to be a part of planting some new bushes.

Are you detecting a theme here?  You would be on to something if you observed that Master Gardening is getting me through this difficult time in my life. And I am thankful for this group and their support more than I can say.

Anyway...


A return trip to say Thank You...
The step back?  Well, it all started with that trip last Friday to see the Bereavement Counselor at Hospice.  I had baked some Triple Chip Cookies (recipe below) to take to the staff, many of whom I had not had the chance to say 'goodbye' and 'thank you' since Mom died at 4:00 a.m. - several hours before the Day Shift came in on that Friday, four weeks ago today.  So, before my appointment, I went into the Hospice Home to deliver the cookies and my appreciation...and to return a book that I'd found in my knitting bag.  I hugged in at the Team Station and all was well, if only a bit wet from the tears.  I got to see several of Momma's nurses, aides, her doctor, and the social worker...and I felt as surrounded by their love and care as I had before.

Then, I took the book back to the desk (a beautiful Bob Timberlake design, by the way) where I'd found it in the Sun Room...and that route took me right past Momma's room.  Of course, another family was there with their family member.  But I didn't need to enter the room to have all those feelings come flooding back.  Whoosh!

Apparently, I tamped them down into my subconscious, because I really didn't talk about that experience with Amanda the Counselor.  It was too new, too raw to discuss so soon, I suppose.  But every day this week, I have tried to do a little work in Momma's rooms...and each night after I do that, I have very vivid dreams about the morning she died...in Room 101.  And, then to top it all off, after the landscapers arrived yesterday to make quick work of cleaning up the Way Back, I just dissolved into a puddle when I came inside and thought about how that area had been my refuge from all my caregiving responsibilities.  So, the grieving is definitely not over...not by a long shot. Sigh.

I'm so lucky to have Mr. T by my side this week so that I don't have to deal with all of this on my own. Where would I be without him?  And, since he has his own moments, he appreciates being able to talk about those to someone close to the issue. That's where Happy Hour in the Morning Room (no, not in the morning...:-) comes to the rescue.  He's doing his end-of-the-month, end-of-the-quarter stuff, so he has to be close to home...most of the time.  Today, he was off to Charlotte so early that he said he'd get his coffee on the road instead of making a pot at the crack o' dawn.  But, he'll be home in plenty of time for Friday Night Pizza and Beer!

And, we are both getting excited about this weekend, when Missy M and my grand-dogs Ella Rae and Dixie come for a long visit.  Woo hoo! We've got something special planned for the next week, especially since this is Mr. T's birthday week...more on that in my next post.


Can you see them?
Two rainbows over High Point!
So, I regroup...because I can't be too sad for too long. I have lots of people and support and activities to help move me forward...to keep me from sliding back too far.

And, I have faith.

Speaking of which, I forgot to share this photo I took as we were returning to HPNC after Momma's funeral.  Remember...we saw a Double Rainbow last September, just about this same time, when we were in Maui?

Two sets of double rainbows in one year?! I'm so lucky!    Maybe I should go buy a lottery ticket...:-)


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Triple Chip Cookies

1 stick of butter, softened
3/4 cup brown sugar, packed
3/4 cup granulated sugar
2 eggs
1 tsp. vanilla
2 1/4 cup self-rising flour
1 cup chocolate chips
1/2 cup butterscotch chips
1/2 cup white chocolate chips
1 cup pecans, chopped (opt.)

Preheat oven to 375 degrees.  Line cookie sheet(s) with parchment paper. Set aside.

In a large bowl, beat the butter and sugars together.  Add eggs, one at a time, and continue to beat until fluffy. Add vanilla and mix in.  Slowly, add in flour until well-blended.  Stir in chips and nuts; blend thoroughly.

Using a cookie scoop (or small ice cream scoop), form cookies on cookie sheets.  I can usually get 11 or 12 cookie "balls" on a sheet.  Bake for 11-13 minutes, or until lightly browned.  Do NOT overbake.  Remove from oven, and allow to cool on the cookie sheet for at least 2 minutes.  Remove cookies to baking rack(s) to finish cooling.  Store in airtight container to keep soft and chewy. 

This recipe makes enough for 24-30 large cookies. You can even freeze 1/2 of the recipe (after forming the cookies) for baking at a later date.  Enjoy!

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