Monday, February 28, 2011

Rewind

Don't you sometimes wish you could hit the REWIND button on your life?  Maybe to go back to the moment before you made a huge decision...that you now see was exactly the wrong decision to make.  Possibly to go back to before you said something you wish you hadn't said to someone.  Or, just to go back to the moment you thought "I don't have time to stop for gas this morning; I'm running late already.  I'll stop this afternoon on the way home."  Yeah, right.

I downloaded some photos from a couple of weekends ago, and it allowed me to hit REWIND on my own life...if only for a brief period.  Back to before we had gotten the news about Mom's lung cancer...and our whole focus changed.

Ella Rae and Dixie in the garden
Missy M was here then with my grand-dogs her sweetie-pie-mutt-mutts, Dixie and Ella Rae.  They are both such bundles of energy...and make it almost impossible to snap a decent photo.  Believe me, I tried!  All I had to show for my efforts was a half-frame shot like this (right).  They loved being able to get into the garden...but, they didn't seem to get the concept of walking/running on the paths, NOT on the nice rows.  You should see the row of lettuce I planted with Dixie's help that weekend:  it now has tiny plants growing in these huge Basset-sized paw-prints, right in the middle of the row!



Maredith and Thomas
warming up on the deck on a cold night
in early February

We had some steaks we wanted to grill out, and we didn't let a little (hahahahaha) cold weather stop us. Bring it on!

We opened a cold bottle of Chateau Ste. Michelle Riesling. (I toured that Washington State winery before Missy M was born...and I still love their wines.)  Mr. T got the grill going, and then he rounded up the little firepit and the fire-starters we use as mini-logs.  Missy M raided the hall closet for jackets and gloves and hand-knitted scarves (photo, left).  The night was remarkably clear, and the stars were out in force.  It was just lovely.






Trimming the boards for the Piano Bar Veranda

That was the same weekend that Mr. T built us a new deck onto the garden shed.  It was designed as a simple rectangle, about 6 x 8...just big enough for a couple of chairs and a small table, where we could enjoy a cup of coffee in the morning...or a cold beer, after a long day working in the garden.  Well, he's constitutionally incapable of building something as designed...even if he is the one who designed it!  By the time he'd finished, he'd re-worked the deck-top into what we are now calling The Piano Bar Veranda (imagine:  the top of a baby-grand piano...:).  Amazing!

Was that really just two weeks ago?  Sigh.

Ah well...moving forward. 

Mom's had a good week, with more good days than bad.  Her pain meds are working well, she's tolerating the increased dosage, and we are thankful for that.  We are baffled about nerve pain in her feet that wakes her in the night (no other symptoms).  And, while her good humor is present most of the time, her energy level is low.

Bro T will be with us through Thursday when he heads back home to KY...although I really don't know what we'll do when he's gone.  He has brought such a ray of sunshine that we will all miss terribly...until he returns in April.  We've got fingers (and toes) crossed that SIL LaD's health is improved and can come back with him.

And, I must say that all the cards and messages that have arrived here at Casa 3917 have made her (and us) feel so loved and supported.  "Thank you" seems so inadequate...but it's all I can think of at the moment.

Thank you.  From the bottom of my heart.

Monday, February 21, 2011

A Good Report

King Alfred blooms in the front yard
You know it's going to be a good day when your first daffodil blooms, right?

Although things are not back to normal around here, I did want to post a report that we've had a good weekend.  ["Back to normal?"  What the heck is that?  I'd have a hard time defining "normal" now that we are dealing with Momma's diagnosis of lung cancer.  Oh well.]

Since Nana/Momma/Edith's pain management doctor increased her Duragesic patch from 50 to 75 last week, her pain has been better-controlled...and, without too much "fuzziness" of words or thoughts that morphine can sometimes bring on. AW, her BFF that lives just a few minutes away, has been over and has called regularly; don't know what we'd do without her. Additionally, my brother J was here from Nashville for a short visit, so that helped lift her spirits; he'll be returning sooner rather than later, I'm sure. T (our half-brother from KY, who is the spitting image of our father and who reminds us that he is retired and doesn't have to watch a clock or a calendar...:) is also here for an extended stay. He is a great conversationalist...like our Daddy, he will talk readily (and at length) about almost any subject, and is willing and eager to sit and chat with Momma while I get the "necessaries" taken care of. He even sat in her room and watched the WHOLE Duke basketball game last night, even though he's not really a fan; and, he's watching "The Price is Right" (one of her favs) with her right now. Bless him!

I've spent the morning responding to messages that friends and family have sent.  No doubt, that brought fresh tears flowing; and though I'm still stumbling through some of the motions in life, trying to regain my bearings and footing, I know there are people "out there" who care.  I cannot begin to describe how loved and supported I feel today!  Thank you, thank you, thank you!!

After I publish this post, I'll finish a little laundry and then head to my potting table to get some seeds started.  It's time to think about head lettuce, eggplant, and several of the herbs. 

I'll pick up my knitting bag and try to work out a problem with my toe-up socks.  I tried to deal with it earlier, but I couldn't concentrate on the stitch-count.

And tonight, I'll fix spaghetti for supper.  I've been fixing spaghetti for Monday night supper for so long that it's almost habit.  And, at times like these, I need to rely on rote.  Get the ground beef and tomatoes out of the freezer to thaw.  Chop the onions, peppers, and celery...

One foot in front of the other...and keep moving forward.

Friday, February 18, 2011

The Final Steps of the Journey

Those of you who know me know that I'm a glass-is-half-full person.  I always look for the positive in situations; the silver lining in the clouds.  I can usually see humor...sometimes in the strangest places.  And, I live by the credo:  Just put one foot in front of the other and keep moving forward, no matter what.

Today, I'm struggling.  I'm in shock.  And, I'm finding it awfully hard to find anything positive to say.

First, some background.  Most of you know that my mother (AKA:  Nana/Momma/Edith or N/M/E) lives with us...has lived with us since my Daddy died nearly 21 years ago.  I know, I know...that arrangement doesn't work for everyone, and we've certainly had our share of rough spots along the way.  Three generations under one roof for many of those years.  Fortunately, we've made it this far, and we're all still speaking to one another.

Mom's had more than her fair share of health concerns in her lifetime.  She's endured so many surgeries that we typically need two pages to list them all when we fill out forms in doctors' offices. And, while she's had the usual appendectomy, hysterectomy, and gall bladder surgery, she's also had some other interesting medical procedures. 

Ever heard of Mohs Micrographic surgery?  That was for skin cancers on her nose, neck, and ears.  How about a Level 5 Lumbar fusion with 10 pedicle screws and a TLIF (transforaminal lumbar interbody fusion) cage?  Hoo-boy, she lights up an xray screen...and you wouldn't want to get behind her in the Airport Security line.  That was her second back surgery, by the way.  Then there was the Morton's neuroma surgery on both feet.  Oh, and breaking her ankle while recovering from cataract surgery (both eyes).  Rotator cuff surgery, twice on the right shoulder...and it still didn't work. Knee replacement, right knee?  Piece of cake, comparatively.  And when she had lobectomy surgery in 1998 to remove a Stage 1 lung cancer and lower left lobe, a pulmonary something-or-other was nicked accidentally, causing fluid to leak...and the subsequent surgery to repair the damage from the first surgery was preceded by mandatory consumption of a half-gallon of Haagen Daz ice cream at 4:00 a.m.  Oh yes, that one was written up in the medical journals.

Even with all of that, we weren't prepared for the news we got this week.  We'd spent much of Monday at the doctor's office, seeking help for the source of Mom's latest issue:  diagnosis of a sharp, stabbing pain under her rib cage, left side.  No, she hasn't fallen...well, at least not in the last 3 months or so.  (The last fall tore the left rotator cuff and left her with extremely limited mobility in both arms.) 

After examining her, Doctor K...dear, sweet man that he is...seemed to think she had a "spontaneous rib fracture."  Well, why didn't I think of that?  Could it be because I'd never heard of such a thing!  He ordered a chest xray, and we headed down to the first floor radiology center.  No need for us to hang around for the results, he said; he'd call us at home tomorrow with the report.

By the next morning, I had 4 voice messages from his nurse on my cell phone (which I'd left in the car overnight).  He wanted to see us as soon as possible; could we please come into the office when we got the message(s)?

There really is no easy way to tell someone that he/she has lung cancer.  Still, Dr. K did a superb job of presenting the news with kindness and concern and caring.  Since his own mother is about the same age as Mom, and experiencing multiple health problems of her own, his level of compassion is considerably higher than most doctors you encounter.  He told us what the radiologist had found and what Mom's options were.  Most importantly, he gave Mom the permission she needed to choose palliative care instead of curative treatment, and assured her that he's on board for hospice care, when that time comes.

Speaking of time...who knows?  Could be weeks, months, or even a year or more.  I'm sure I'll want more than what we'll have.

When Mom's niece and my first cousin died, Mom wondered out loud:  why am I still here, when I'm so much older than she was?  I hazarded a guess that it was because we (our generation of cousins) needed her (the last surviving member of her generation on two branches of her family tree) to teach us how to be the surviving members of a generation.  She would be our guide.

After Wednesday, my answer has changed somewhat.  We still need her as our guide, only now it's to teach us how to finish the journey we started.

Monday, February 7, 2011

Whoosh! There Went Another Weekend!!

OK.  Where did the weekend go?  It was Thursday...and now it's Monday already.  I'd look under the bed to see if those 3 days are hiding there, but I'm afraid of what else I might find.  It wasn't that we wasted the time, either...it's just that there wasn't enough to suit.

The Irregardless Cafe in Raleigh

We didn't let (first) the sleet or (next) the rain-rain-and-more-rain deter us from our date on Friday.  Mr. T and I headed East on I-40 to Raleigh for the soothing sounds of the NC Symphony, followed by some tasty treats at the Irregardless Cafe (photo, left). Winners on both counts!  I had started a baby sweater (not for anyone in particular; had just the right yarn, found a cute pattern in a magazine that I wanted to try, and needed something that was plain knit and purl, at least on a portion...:), so I worked on that during the performance, getting most of the back done by the final notes...I find that simple knitting helps me focus on the music. 

Then, taking a chance on trying out a new (to us) restaurant, we both enjoyed our orders (chicken salad sandwich with potato-corn chowder and chicken-and-veggie kabobs with tabbouleh) with relish.  I was going to take a photo of the food, but forgot...and then it was gone, just like that.  Too bad you have to settle for that rather dark picture of the front of the building.  Tee hee.

Saturday was spent with indoor chores, since the sun didn't make an appearance until after 5:00...when it was then time to set.  Plus, the ground was so saturated from the rains that we couldn't have worked in the garden anyway.  No matter...in between the loads of wash, etc., I found some time to finish off a couple of library books that were due 2/6:  Teatime for the Traditionally Built (#10 in the #1 Ladies' Detective Agency series) by Alexander McCall Smith, and Christmas Mourning by NC author and fav mystery writer, Margaret Maron (this one, being so newly-available, was on a 14-day loan, making it non-renewable...and Mom had wanted to read it first...:).  Nothing like a deadline to get me motivated. 

I am behind in the #1 Ladies...series, and I have already downloaded the #11 book, The Double Comfort Safari Club from Audible.com.  OK...I've actually already started listening to it on my drives to-and-fro from Master Gardener classes.  You see...I'm trying to get caught up before the next one in the series (The Saturday Big Tent Wedding Party) is published in March.  I just adore the beautiful rhythms of these little (for they are smallish in size) books...and I'm now hooked on the TV series on HBO.

I also completed my online chapter test for "Soils and Fertilizers," in my Master Gardener training.  All the dirt on soil, as our instructor said.  Ahem.  Since I was already in the mood to read and study, I did a little work on the next chapter:  "Houseplants." 

A little more knitting (starting on the cabled-pattern part of the baby sweater, which required a tad more concentration) during a movie on DVD, followed by a catch-up on the shows we'd captured on the DVR from last week, and suddenly Saturday was history.

Sunday, of course, was the Big Day for Football.  Pulling for the Packers, we dressed in green and gold for the day.  Since we'd planned on watching the game, we knew that meals would be suspended in favor of snacks for most of the afternoon and evening.  As such, I figured we'd better start the day off with a special, hearty breakfast of waffles, eggs, and sausage.  I pulled out the waffle iron to let it heat up while I mixed up the batter. 

Vintage Toastmaster Waffle Iron -
Still works great!!

The waffle iron (photo, right) was Mom's (rarely used...:) and is about the same age as I...nearly qualifying it as an antique.  It is a Toastmaster Model 263, and one just like it on Ebay is called "vintage."  No matter, it makes great waffles...still!  The plates are coated with a non-stick surface (early Teflon?) that is clearly better than what is made today, showing no signs of nicks or scratches.  They are also removable, with waffle-grids on one side and a flat surface for grilled sandwiches on the reverse.  I pop 'em out and into the dishwasher to clean.  Who could ask for anything more?

Actually, I thought I'd killed it.  I sprayed the plates with Pam (tm) prior to plugging it in, but I neglected to check to see if the plates were properly seated, under their clips.  When I turned to get the batter...and then turned back to the waffle iron, which was pre-heating on the counter, a flame leaped out of the left side!  Yikes!!  Apparently, I had sprayed some of the spray on one of the heating elements, which had been exposed when the upper plate slipped to the side...and which flared up in protest.  I unplugged it, let it cool, cleaned the spray away, and started the process over.  Thankfully, no real damage was done.  Whew...

Chocolate-dipped Strawberries
 Super Bowl snacks in our house are usually centered around salty flavors...and cheese.  So, I made up a half-batch of Chex Mix (called Nuts 'n Bolts around here...:), some Rotel dip (a can of Rotel tomatoes, which I drain...unlike the "official" recipe; added to 1# of Velveeta cheese, cut into chunks and melted; with some cooked sausage crumbles for added flavor...all served in a heat-proof dish, kept warm and melty on the warmer tray, just right for dipping with corn chips), and some Sausage and Cheese Balls, served with hot mustard.  Sliced a red-rind sharp cheddar cheese bar; opened a container of Port Wine cheese spread.  Put out various crackers and chips; carrots and celery sticks...and it's a party!  For a dessert-like treat, I made Chocolate-dipped Strawberries* (photo, left; recipe, below).  Yummy!

Before we knew it, it was time to head to bed.  Mr. T had an early start, as he was in the car and on the road by 8:00 a.m.  And, I had to finish off the chores so I could get some writing time in...today would be my only day for that this week, I'm afraid.

And, whoosh, it'll be the weekend once again!



====================================================
*Chocolate-dipped Strawberries Recipe


Ingredients:

1 pint of ripened strawberries with stems and leaves intact; washed and dried thoroughly; best if cold
1 cup chocolate chips - either dark, white, semi-, milk or even chocolate mint flavors
1 T. Crisco (no substitute...NOT oil, NOT butter, NOT margarine)

Put the chips and the Crisco in a microwavable bowl (I use a 4-cup Pyrex measuring cup) and microwave on HIGH for 1 minute, 15-30 seconds.  Stir until all chips are melted and creamy.

Holding the strawberries by the stem, dip into the melted chocolate mixture.  Place dipped berries on a cookie sheet which has been covered in wax paper; refrigerate for at least 30 minutes or until chocolate is firm again.

Enjoy!

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

68 One Day...38 The Next

What a tease.  The weather turned "unseasonably" warm this past weekend, and we headed outside with a skip in our steps.  It was fantastic!  And, it was fleeting.  But, before I begin bemoaning the return of the thirties, let me dwell for a few paragraphs on the thrill of the sixties...however brief it be.


Mr. T tries out the Mantis tiller
 On Saturday, we broke out the Mantis tiller we've borrowed from Missy M.  She's got raised beds in her garden now, so she doesn't use it anymore.  It was just sitting in her shed, so we shifted it to NC several months ago.  Haven't had a chance to crank'er up until now.  And, since the ground was still a bit too damp from the recent snows for the Big Boy Tiller, we decided to give the little lady one a try.

Mr. T got the motor going and tilled up some rows around the back of our mailbox (photo, left), expanding the flower bed we put in last year. 


Blue Star Hyacinth bulbs...finally in the ground
 You see, I had purchased some Blue Star hyacinth bulbs (photo, right) in November (past the time for fall planting) at half-price, with every good intention of forcing a few of them for Christmas gifts.  OK, so that didn't happen (this year...:), and the bulbs spent the last 10 weeks chilling out in the garage.  When I checked the box on Friday, I noticed they were ALL sporting tiny buds on beautiful, fat bulbs...not a single one had been lost.  Hooray for happenstance!  Let's get these puppies in the ground!!  We planted 68 bulbs, most in front...some in back by the new garden shed.




Row of green peas
 Mr. T showed me how to use the Mantis...and there was no stopping me then!  He tilled up a couple of rows in the garden on Saturday to demonstrate, and then I tilled 7 more rows on Sunday.  I got a row of green peas planted (photo, left), plus a row of carrots and a row of spinach...and, I got rows ready for lettuce and beets.

Aren't you pushing the season?  asked Missy M.  A little bit, says I.  But not by too much.  The planting guide says that we can begin planting peas, carrots, and spinach on February 1st...and January 29-30 looks awfully close on the calendar, don't you think?  Plus, the carrots and spinach are covered with row covers for cold-weather protection. 


Taking soil samples

In addition to the planting activities, I collected 12 samples for soil testing (photo, right).  I dug them up on Sunday and left them out to dry some.  Then, on Monday, when the weather had returned to Winter, I went about collecting the samples for the boxes.  Hoo-boy, that was hard, since the cold wind was cutting right through my jacket and hood.  Thank goodness for garden gloves...which kept my hands warm all the while!

I'll send these samples off to Raleigh, as directed on the boxes, and hopefully we'll get good reports on what amendments we need to add to enhance our soil.


Cold frame from straw bales and windows
 Last but not least, before it turned cold again, Mr. T "constructed" our cold frame, using four bales of straw and four windows (photo, left).  We'll use it to start seeds and harden off plants as the season goes along. 

He'd "rescued" these windows along with several of their friends from a roadside in PA last year, and we've been eager to get them into use here in NC.  We plan on putting two in the garden shed's back wall to give light and air to the inside of the structure, and I want to hang a couple of them (after painting the frames purple Blooming Wisteria, of course...:) on the side wall, with flower boxes beneath them.  Photos to follow!

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